Before Mother's Day Ends - A Word or Two for Shirley

Today, as I was calling my mother to wish her Happy Mother’s Day, it occurred to me how very fortunate I have been to have had Shirley Grossman as my mom during the past 5 ½ years as I battled cancer.  I have paid tribute to a lot of folks over the years in this blog – particularly my doctors, husband and children.  However, the unsung hero throughout this entire ordeal has been my mom.

I can’t possibly imagine the pain of finding out that your child has cancer.  From the beginning, I have said on multiple occasions, “Thank God that I’m the one that has cancer and not one of the girls.  I can handle this as my struggle, but to watch one of the girls go through it – that would be more than I could bear.”  A few years ago, we had a brief period when we thought that Ariel had cancer and I felt like curling up in a ball every time I thought about it. 

From Day 1, second to Pat, my mom has been my biggest cheerleader.  She jumped into action, reading everything she could get her hands on about how to beat this disease.  She flew down for each surgery that I had.  She came with me to oncology appointments.  She took care of the girls.  She took care of Pat.  And – she took care of me.  Not just my physical needs, but my spirit, too.  She never is without her necklace that reads simply “Hope.”

I can’t imagine the fear that she has endured.  My rollercoaster has been hers, too.  But she has been strong and confident that I’m going to beat this.  I’ve written multiple times on this blog about this cancer battle being a mental struggle as much as it is a physical one.  I’m constantly looking for clues that the cancer is going away or that it’s growing.  Every pain in my body I attribute to cancer growth (Pat finally said the other day, “Eve – you have pain in your hip because you’re getting old – not because you grew more cancer.”)  Just a few weeks ago, a sharp pain in my gut had me on the verge of tears for 3 days because the docs told me that it was possible that the pain signaled tumor growth in my colon (they eventually decided that it was either a gas bubble or someone with an “Eve Voodoo Doll” poking at it.)  Every scan creates a huge amount of anxiety.  It’s exhausting.  And I know it’s exhausting for her, too.

But – through it all, she never showed anything but confidence in my ability to fight this disease and win.  She is so determined.  Her will is so strong that it lifts me up and makes me fight harder.  For those of you who know my mom, you know how disciplined she is – exercising every day, never eating sweets, working harder than everyone else, always excelling at everything she takes on.  Which makes me so lucky to have her in my corner – fighting this battle along side me.

So – today – I want to pay tribute to my mom and say a special thanks to her for her strength, wisdom and love.  I am so very grateful. 

Happy Mother’s Day to you, mom, and to all of the other wonderful moms who are fighting for their children's health and happiness every single day.